The emotional dam finally broke, and I let my tears flow. It was long past time.

Day after day I’d read a Lenten devotional that should have broken my heart. Though I felt pangs of sorrow, there was no breakthrough. No  lament.

Certainly American racism  is a reason to weep, but I’ve been immersed in it my entire life. I’ve grown dull to it because it was my norm, so even a powerful document like “An American Lament Devotional”* didn’t awaken my long-slumbering heart.

The devotional started to shake my soul awake, but it was my friend Karen’s personal story of visiting the area where her family had been enslaved that gave me the final jolt I needed.  I love Karen. She’s shared her gifts and friendship with me, so when she wrote out her hurt, I felt her pain. With an almost audible “Crack!” the shell broke off my heart, and I felt at least a fraction of what our God must feel when His image bearers suffer.

I believe that God saw my anguish and called it good.

Even though we follow the Savior who wept, we Christians have crossed a treacherous line. We’ve made the extreme swing from following our feelings (un-Biblical and unhealthy) into the opposite danger-zone of dulling our feelings. In addition, we give our dulled emotions the virtuous label of “faith.” You know what I mean. You’ve heard things said like, “She has such strong faith. She hasn’t broken down at all since he died.” That’s why I’ve labored here over unpacking the Scriptural reality of God’s emotions.

Faith and feelings aren’t mutually exclusive.

In fact, God’s emotions should be reflected in His image bearers, especially in those who love Him. We don’t let our emotions rule us, but we leverage them to stay engaged to those around us. Allowing ourselves to feel God’s emotions keeps us awake to the suffering of this broken world.

I confess that I don’t like feeling some of those emotions. They’re uncomfortable and ruffle the calm of my life.  As a result, we humans become adept at implementing two self-protective strategies instead: running to someone to help us deal with our emotions or turning to something to dull our emotions.

Running to Someone to Deal 

When I bumped up against circumstances or issues that caused pain, I was quick in the past to turn to others to help me deal with the ouch. I’d call my mom to get some mama-comfort, schedule coffee with a friend to hash it all out, or ask for my husband’s sage advice.

A decade ago, a friend listened carefully to my coping mechanisms and then asked a piercing question, “Do you run to the phone or the Throne?”

Womp womp. I think I’ve already revealed the dismal answer to that question. I regularly ran to the phone to find someone to help me deal with my anger, sorrow, or pain.

Now there are even more outlets for running to someone than ever before– texting, FaceTime, and all manner of social media. After all, there’s nothing like a Facebook poll to decide how you should feel about something! Running to someone to deal has become a normalized reaction.

Turning to Something to Dull

Like no other culture in history, we have hundreds of ways to dull the way we feel. There’s alcohol, drugs, or my drug-of-choice, food. We’re dulled by every form of entertainment, and we constantly have screens in front of our eyes or earbuds in our ears.

Avoidance is probably my most turned-to dulling tactic. I’ll do things like:

• Read books with little substance to keep my mind distracted by the world around me.
• Declare “I don’t watch the news!” as if it makes me a better Christian.
• Write off a difficult relationship, “ghosting” instead of having a painful conversation.

Do you recognize any of those dealing or dulling habits in your own life?

When I pondered the value of God’s emotions in the world, I realize that His emotions–love, compassion, mercy, sorrow– are what propel Him to engage with us. I’m determined to do the same, allowing my enlivened emotions to compel me to engage with the people God so loves in this world of ours.

What do you use to deal or dull?

How might it change your life to wake up your feelings instead of using “faith” as an excuse to dull?

Note: In the next post, I’m going to interview my friend Karen along with our other friends, Beth and Kenisha, who went on the trip together. Stay tuned to hear how God has used the feelings the trip stirred up!

* “An American Lament Devotional,” a 40-day resource developed by the Repentance Project, is highly recommended. I urge you to download your copy today.

In high school, I was jealous when the guy I liked decided that he preferred my best friend. [Sad confession alert…] As an adult woman, I’ve been jealous when a friend spent more time with another friend than with me.

Jealousy has been personified as the “Green-Eyed Monster,” and it’s a really icky emotion when a human experiences it. Its root is covetousness, which we know is a sin, so it has to be bad. Right?

Years ago, I heard Oprah say that she no longer believes in the God of the Bible since the Bible states that God is jealous. She deemed jealousy as an impossible negative emotion for a great God.

It may be easy to pile-on and criticize Oprah’s beliefs, but based on our human version of jealousy, it’s a strange emotion for God to have. Can we agree on that? It’s a “negative” emotion that a newcomer to the Bible wouldn’t expect from God.

The important thing to remember is that God is jealous for us, not of us. We don’t have anything that God lacks and wants, that He would covet, but He desires that His people give Him their whole heart.

The first time we read that God is “jealous” is in the Ten Commandments where it says, “You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments.” (Exodus 20: 4-6)

Over and over again in Scripture, God’s jealousy is referenced in relation to idol worship which breaks the first commandment, “You shall have no other gods before me.” (Exodus 20:3)

I’m fascinated by the end of Exodus 20:6 because it shows us the root of God’s jealousy for us. He’s jealous for us because of His great love for us. God, our Creator, also knows that serving only Him is best for us.

God’s jealousy is founded on His goodness–His love and His good plans for us.

That’s also the origin of the last “negative” emotion of God that I’ll cover, grief. Psalm 78:40-41 says, “How often they rebelled against him in the wilderness and grieved him in the wasteland! Again and again they put God to the test; they vexed the Holy One of Israel.”

God is grieved by our rebellion and sin. Why? He knows that sin separates us from Him, leading to a life less than the one for which we were created. Walking close to God in holiness and repentance brings Him glory, and it brings good into our lives.

We see the whole gamut of God’s emotions through His Son, Jesus, too:

• Anger as He turned over the money changers tables. (John 2:13-17)
• Jealousy/zealousness for His Father’s house in the same circumstance.
• Grief over the death of His friend, Lazarus (John 11:35)
• Grief as He faced a terrible death and the withdrawal of His Father (Luke 22:39-46)

In our Bible, God defines Himself, both His character and emotions, and Jesus is the exact representation of His Father (Hebrews 1:3). Jesus displayed a beautiful gamut of emotions that His Father also possesses.

As those made in God’s image, we’re created with a range of emotions too that can be employed for good. So… why are we as a culture determined to numb ourselves?

That’s what I’ll dig into in upcoming posts. Thanks for sticking with me as I wrestle through these new areas of study and thought! I’d love to hear your thoughts on God’s emotions. I’m learning too, and our community is so helpful.

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I’m excited to be booking speaking events for 2020! Spring is close to being full, but there are February and April dates still available. Summer and fall are wide open, and I’d love to speak for your group.

My Exhale Retreat, which can also be done as a keynote, is what I’m most fired up about right now. Why? Because I’m seeing an unprecedented response among women to these messages that are rooted in Colossians 1. Jesus is setting His women free through His Word! Here’s a description:

Exhale: Lose Who You’re Not. Love Who You Are. Live Your One Life Well.

Do you feel like you’re suffocating under the pressures of being all things to all people? The pressure of filling every unfilled spot at church, work and home. The pressure of trying to do it all right, make decisions that benefit everyone else, and keep everyone happy.

There’s a process that can release you from the unbearable weight. Then you’ll be able to live the combination we all long for–fulling the desires of your heart, loving your people well, and bringing glory to God.

Rather than adding more to your to-do list, in this retreat Amy will help you to:

• Move from running-on-empty to spent-and-content by investing your life in soul-filling ways.
• Lose the ill-fitting rolls you’ve been trying to fill so that you can be lighter and freer.
• Love your truest, God-created self with all your glorious gifts instead of trying to shove yourself into someone else’s mold.
• Live your one and only life in a way that you know truly matters.

DREAM BIG and have Cheri Gregory, my co-author, and me both come. If you want to fill your spring small group studies, imagine using the Exhale retreat with Cheri and me as your launch!

To book me for your women’s event, please click here and fill out the form. Karen Christian, Proverbs 31 Ministries’ speaker coordinator, will get in touch with you for fees and scheduling. I hope to be in the room with you soon!

Since I was a little girl, I’ve been uncomfortable with negative emotions. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve expressed plenty of negative emotions– tantrums, meltdowns, down days that I wanted to stay in bed– but they’ve always felt bad or wrong. For example, I would shut out God if I couldn’t bring my sunny self.

I’m gaining a healthier view, but for a long time I carried an over-simplified categorization of emotions as “positive” or “negative.” You can probably guess the breakdown:

Positive emotions– Joy, happiness, gratitude, love, generosity, peace, hope, serenity, confidence…

Negative emotions– Sadness, despair, stinginess, hate, overwhelm, turmoil, hopelessness, insecurity…

You get the gist, and the funny thing is that some of these came from lists I found when I Googled “positive emotions list” and “negative emotions list.” I’m not the only one that categorizes this way. The internet doesn’t lie!  Yet, I took these categories one step further. One step too far. I wrongly thought:

Negative emotions are unrighteous.

That statement is untrue because our perfect and holy God holds some of what I’ve considered “negative” emotions– anger, hate, jealousy, and grief. Because God also feels these emotions, we can safely say that these feelings can actually lead to righteousness.

Context is really important. I’m pretty sure most of my meltdowns haven’t been a bit righteous, but we can’t define all negative emotions as bad.

Let’s take God’s anger as an example. Psalm 7:11 says, “God is a righteous judge, a God who displays his wrath every day.” Wow. Wrath every day is a lot of wrath, but the cause of God’s anger is what maintains His status as a righteous judge. His wrath is fueled by:

• Wickedness (Romans 1:18)
• Disobedience (I Kings 11:9-10)
• Dishonesty (Proverbs 11:1)
• Injustice (Proverbs 17:15)

In relation, there are things that God hates which stoke His anger:

• Proverbs 6:16-18
  •  haughty  eyes
  • a lying tongue
  • hands that shed innocent blood
  • a heart that devises wicked scheme
  • feet that are quick to rush into evil
  • a false witness who pours out lies
  • a person who stirs up conflict in the community
• Psalm 5:5
  • the arrogant
  • those who do wrong
• Psalm 11:5
  • those who do violence

From my last post, we know that God’s feelings are immutable and incorruptible. Now we’ve established that even God’s negative emotions are righteous and leveled at unrighteousness. I’ll write about how these truths inform us how to engage our emotions in godly ways, but let’s part with a few questions to consider:

• How does God’s anger and hate inform how I look at the world?
• How does the sacrifice of Jesus expand on the story of God’s anger?
• How does the cross combine God’s “positive” and “negative” emotions?

I’d love to hear your thoughts as you’re processing with me!

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When I was out shopping yesterday, I was assaulted/delighted by all the Christmas displays. (I LOVE Christmas, as you can hear in this fun episode of Grit ‘n’ Grace, but before Halloween? Really?)

So, like most of you, my Christmas shopping list was jump-started. If you’re in that mode now, I have great news! Christianbook.com is running a great sale on Exhale: Lose Who You’re Not. Love Who You Are. Live Your One Life Well., and shipping is free with a $35 purchase. If you buy a copy of Exhale for Aunt Sally, cousin Joan, your best friend Marge, and your neighbor (you know she really needs it), you’ll have lots of your bases covered at a bargain! Click here to order. Coupon code: MEGASALE19

Today, surrounded by warm sunshine, towering palms, and blue water, I feel a rush of joy that seems like it will last forever.

Moments later, my mood is interrupted by a frisson of anxiety over my son’s interview, and less than a half an hour more finds me wrestling with confusion over what to write here.

Our days are like that, aren’t they? Fleeting happiness followed by bouts of worry displaced by teetering faith which is superseded by a spate of doubt. Our human emotions are highly unpredictable and seldom sustainable.

And yet they’re a gift, a reflection of the image of God.

Truthfully, my emotions feel like a mixed blessing, and trying to capture the gift of them while minimizing the curse isn’t easy. I’m starting this “Feel” series with several posts about the emotions of God, but it has required some research on my part to make sure that I stay theologically straight for you, my readers, and for myself, a woman who longs to follow God with as much purity as humanly possible. Before we go on, I want to share a truth that sets God’s emotions apart from our human emotions:

God has emotions, but His are both immutable and incorruptible.

1. They’re immutable. God’s character and nature never changes, so unlike humans, He is not susceptible to “mood swings”. Every emotion He has is consistent and completely in line with His permanent will and dependable promises.
2. They’re incorruptible. God is without sin, and His emotions are the same. They aren’t swayed by circumstances or give to fits of extremes based on selfishness. God’s emotions are a beautiful reflection of His perfection.

This quote helped my understanding so much, “There are two wonderful things concerning God and emotions: first, He understands our emotions (since He created us with the capacity to feel them), and, second, His own emotions continually flow from His perfection. God will never have a bad day; He will never change His feelings toward His redeemed.” (Source: https://www.gotquestions.org/does-God-have-emotions.html)

One of the emotions I treasure most in this life is joy, and it’s rich because its source is God Himself. As I read Scripture, God’s greatest joy seems to be in us. Unimaginable.

Zephaniah 3: 17 is often quoted but undeniably beautiful, “The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.”

And then there’s this verse that isn’t found on mugs and t-shirts, “As a young man marries a young woman, so will your Builder marry you; as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride, so will your God rejoice over you.” (Isaiah 62:5) Hearkens back to my last post, doesn’t it?

There are others, but one of my favorites points directly to Jesus’ motive for His sacrifice, “For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.” (Hebrews 12:2b) It’s overwhelming to think that Jesus gave His life because of the anticipated joy of being reconciled to us!

In every case, including Jesus’ crucifixion, God’s joy is unchanged by circumstances and pain. It’s uncorrupted by evil or malice.

God’s joy is complete, and ours becomes complete in Him. (John 16:24)

So here we are, wrapped in God’s immeasurable love and the object of His joy. Knowing that we’re the recipient of His emotions– love, joy, mercy and compassion is an awe inspiring truth.

But what’s to be done with His “negative” emotions? I’ll address that question in my next post.